This month has been busy with work so I have pretended like all has been fine on the home front.
Every morning call with my mom, I avoid talking about the issue.
There's just too many other things to think about... it's easier to not have a pit in my stomach the whole day.
Occasionally little stints have come up.
My youngest brother spent his 18th birthday alone in his room because he heard the familiar clinking of bottle in her room.
My sister visited and said there were arguments over my mom sneaking around.
But nothing out of the ordinary.
Then, last night blew everything up again.
My youngest brother is a senior and is going through your typical "senioritis". He got accepted into his number one college and he's always been an incredibly gifted student. So, his motivation to do homework has been slim to none.
From what I gathered, my brother came home last night around 6pm to a rip-roarin' drunken mother, furious over a 'C' on his interim report.
My brother did the right thing - tried to talk it out but knew it was a losing battle, so headed to his room.
I guess the disease didn't like the lack of confrontation, so the phone calls began.
My siblings and I are on a group text together. My sister sends us a message.
"Mom just drunk dialed me saying I should yell at XXX for his grades?"
Then, my older brother chimes in.
"She's tried calling me about five times. I've just declined them all."
Annnnd then, my phone begins to flash.
"Mom Cell"
Decline.
"Mom Cell"
Decline.
We know the drill. Just leave it till morning.
Now, this morning has been littered with phone calls.
My mom called to say hello and I asked what happened.
She had no recollection.
She hysterically sobs.
My step father calls.
She hasn't been going to AA.
Her 'sponsor' is a complete fabrication.
Nothing has changed.
I feel annoyed but not surprised. I feel sad but not depressed.
I guess to put it bluntly, I've given up.
Declining those phone calls felt like my first steps towards embracing my own personal acceptance.
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